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 BLESSINGS IN 2008:  MAY YOU ENJOY YOUR FRIENDS AND MAKE NEW ONES.  MAY YOU PROSPER AND GROW.   MAY YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES BE HELD SAFE IN THE ARMS OF THE LADY.  I WISH YOU LOVE, PROSPERITY, FUN, AND STRENGTH.  BLESSED BE ALL.

Here I am in the living room, doing a little dance of thanks and celebration.  I've been podcasting for about a year now and I am kinda proud of my little show.  Tonight, a lady from my area called me and asked me if I ever considered any advertising.  I was leary at first, knowing that the show is something I do for fun and not for profit, a way to get informatio "out there" to beginning pagans and to people who just want to know what being pagan is all about and I certainly can't afford to advertise something that isn't done for profit...........until she told me she ran her own business, has a magazine that circulates in three nearby states and does psychic fairs in these three states.   She wants to trade advertising.........if I mention her shows and mag, she will run an ad in the magazine and I can put flyers out at her next show to advertise Salem Avenue.   Pretty cool!   OOOPS, I'm almost famous!   made me feel good, anyhow.  

Seems like it's taking a long time to connect with this crystal being.  I don't know what possessed me tonight, I was frustrated because I had no connection at all for the last two nights.  I decided to light a candle, bless my work and then take a purification bath.  So, on a whim, I plopped that chalcedony right into the water and after I started the deep breathing, I just let it rest on my solar plexus, or as near as I could get to where I think it is and just closed my eyes and relaxed in the tub.  First thing behind my eyes, was an outline of wings, like the beginning of a tattoo.....oh, fine, I thougt, Japanese art........first the I Ching, then this.  Next, the outline turned into the most beautiful, I can't describe the colors except they wer mauvey,purplee,electircblue,gold wints, sort of transparent and slowly waving, then a form appeared between the wings, neighter male nor female and I got the impression of transformation........a chrysalis becoming.

Nest thing I know, I, or rather this being is traveling over a long expanse of water, a wide wide river with trees/swampland on both sides........no humanity as far as one could see, just green and this long river, on and on it flew, the river below, speeding by.  suddenly, we are at the top of a waterfall, high in the air, so far you could not see below, we flap our wings and all I can see is the gold of the sun coming through the transparent thrust of the wings..........then this cleared and as we hovered over the lip of the falls, it was not a cliff nor a waterfall byt the eyelash and eyelid of a woman and the river her tears and we flew over the lip of the eyelid and suddenly DROPPED...............down, down down, we a tiny dark speck in an everlasting sea of electric blue.  We tumbled on and on till we came to the icy looking floor of this ocean of blue and around us were the tallest stark clear icy crystals towering far above us and we were tiny and insignificant.

 Then came a trembling and shuddering and we were rushed down a cavern/tunnel of hot red...looked like molten lave, looked like a birth canal, on and on through this tunnel until we were tossed out into dark blue water in the shallows of a beach and above a purple/gold/navy sunset.  The being rose up and walked out of the water, minus wings now, slowing going toward the shore as I told it, "it's okay.  You can come out now". 

I don't know what all this was about unless it was showing me some of the upheaval of changes in the earth..........I have to think on this.....no, wait....the I Ching trigram was Li, fire, and thinking is not the answer.  Well, maybe I'll dream some answers. 

Obviously, the saga will continue.

I spen about 40 minutes trying to connect.  I didn't see much at first....a sort of cave in a mountain with stone in front of it and marking on the stone.................

___    _____

   __   ___

____    _____

This looked familiar but I can't place it.  I thought I saw an eye looking out from bars at a window in a doorway.  Then Fat Cat Nacho climbed on me and positioned himself across my shoulder loking down at the stone.  In my visualization a huge black cat/jaguar/panther outlined in that bright electric blue  was peering down into that vortex of blue and sparkles that I am supposed to go into.  The vortex clears and before me I see a beautiful vallley of green with huge huge spires of crystals far far down below a craggy rocky mountainside.  On the valley floor, crystals are shining, very pointed and tall and all misty lavender, purple and mauves.  The cat sniffs my face and the scene clears abruptly and stark white blank pages of a book appear.  Ther is one line of script at the top of each page but I can't read it.  I end the session. 

As I write, I think tonight I might dream of that valley....then I realized that I don't hvae to "follow" the blue into the vortex and down those fearsome heights.  I can just "will" myself into that valley and be there.  That's for tomorrow I guess.  Also, the marks in that door looked like an I Ching reading.  I felt like needed to toss the I Ching sticks to open that door to the cave.

SIGH.  I know NOTHING about I Ching.

So, tonight, I looked up the I Ching on the 'net.  What I saw was a trigram, specifically the one for FIRE or FLAME or burning wood.  Each  line of the trigram stands for either yang.......the unbroken line, or yin, the broken line.  There is much more meaning than male/female duality.  Yang is time, light and strong..............yin is space, dark and weak.  Yang is the direction upwards, yin downwards.  Yang is the closed circle, yin is open angle.  Yang is clockwise, yin counterclockwise.  Yang is hard, resistant and tense, yin is soft, yeilding and relaxed.  The particular trigram that I saw is Li.........LI. Thinking.     Thinking links up sense data with words, following the wishes or motivations and impulses. Thinking has a beginning and end, visualized in the image of burning wood. You should not think beyond the solution of the problem. The motivation is to attain clarity, unattached to the thought. Thinking, like dialogue, is not an end in itself.

 Does this help me?  Not much. 

Next session is tonight.........romancing the stone.....contacting the crystal being.

Last night was my first meditation with my "crystal being".  I am sorry to say that it was not a great success.  I did have some visions though.  I did my little rituals beborehand then started the breathing exercises and focused on the stone, trying not to have any preconceived notions of whether the "being" was male/female or whatever.  My mind chatter was easier to quiet than usual.  I felt strength and energy in my left hand and began to deepen my breathing and closed my eyes.  Colors swirled behind my eyes and a shape began to emerge.............a being with long dark hair, their back to me washing their face in a stream........just as the figure started to turn toward me, my son, David, yelled Ma.....come here...........and I blew up and yelled leave me alone!  I kept my eyes closed and saw sharp needles of hot red blow up into the vision and I realized that this was how my anger exploded into whatever realm I was seeing.  I kept on with the breathing, calming myself and watched the red ease away.......I started to see colors....the clearest bluest blue I had ever seen then a figure , a hooded warrior's torso astride a horse and a tower ccrumbling and smoke and clouds of black and red and I wondered if this was a time when the rock was formed.  Then I saw a vortex of deepes blue with spralking blues flowing into it.......a blue hold......I knew I was meant to follow the blues but the sparkles dissolved and I saw fringes of red and knew that my anger at my son was simmering still in my body and I should not follow the blues into the vortex in this state.  So, I bid farewell to the being and to the Lord and Lady and thanked all for being patient with me.

I plan to try again tonight.  My son has strict instructions that when I leave the living room and go into my own room I am meditating and he is not to bother me.